tell me there are still miracles in my life

Tuesday, February 9, 2010 at4:39 PM

就当纵容我自己一次，
有一种说不出来的感觉就是想要用华文
来发泄一下情绪
今年的织语丝出版了
看到自己的作文在上面无比的快乐
那种快乐是无人能够给我的
是一种心灵上的肯定
一种安慰
三年来我多盼望着的是每年织语丝里都有我的作品
那么这个梦想已经完成了
大概翻看了一下书里的内容
却惊讶的发现到没有中五学生的文章
是一种鄙视，还是他们没有好的文章？
在我心里产生了一个个的问号.
也让我进入了更深的的思考

我发现从我知道什么是爱，什么是恨以后
我一直在用面具伪装着自己真实的面貌
不想朋友看清我的底线
不想朋友知道我是脆弱的
不像他们知道我曾受过伤
这么多的不想让我的生活增添了一层薄雾
看不清楚也让人有距离感
也许这才是我想拥有的

今天一个人回家少了朋友的聊天声
增添了一丝宁静
坐在车里安静的思考着
才发现我累了，太多东西环绕着我
让我有种窒息的感觉。
到低人活着是为了什么？
还是个问号，永远都是。

next stop ,FORGIVE

Sunday, February 7, 2010 at3:19 PM

i'm HAPPY :))
however ,i was quite sad la the slipper I'M craving currently out of stock
when i heard this i feel like saying 你去死吧！copy alvin's sentence wahahahaha
but overall today is MY DAY !

its the end

Saturday, February 6, 2010 at5:36 PM

what can i start with ?
i just know that my blog has been accumulate a lot of dust :) ,but I've being quite busy with school stuffs & exam + resonation hosting class :) but well i enjoyed a lot . although sometimes being lazy feel like give up on something but with the believes i hold i manage to overcome ,its a good start for the year .
Friday went to camp eagle (leadership) ,what i can say is ITS JUST GOD-DAMN FUN .
it might be tiring but with the unity we hold we overcome it ,with the unity that BIC have we manage to fight till the end ,any personal conflicts stop at yesterday ,today is just a brand new start .
during the games i found that i still take the result more important than the process . its just damn irritating ,& i want to change ,change to a person that enjoy the process but not the outcome ,i still remembered the first time i hosting for the sec 1 心灵加油站 half way through i saw the children's attention were not in my control anymore i told myself ,i ruined the whole thing . actually before that i already told my self i need to done it perfectly ,i practiced again & again at home ,but some people still didn't appreciate yet say me did nothing for my job ,told me i need to be responsible for 300 students .this are just small little obstacles that i need to face it . after my lesson with sec 1 ,i just have the urge to cry ,i thought i did it badly ,but some of my friends said its good ,i didn't believed it i thought they were just trying to cheer me up ,but until i reach home think through the process again & again i found that it doesn't matter about the result the important things is enjoy the process that you've been through .
the same thing happen in camp eagle when i heard my group score to another was 3 :0
i felt sad disappointed ,but i know we have done our best .
i did learnt a lot from the camp eagle ,& i hope BIC member can really be united as one ,all the conflicts we have had being settle yesterday night .
still i want to say ,a person don't be too much to other people don't give all sorts of excuses just to let people feel pity for you ,where is your dignity ,where is pride ,you are a human ,take up the things that you should take up ,responsible for your bloody shit actions ,your speech .don't let people give in too much to you .sorry to say that if one day i burst in-front of you ,don't blame me ,because the consequences is because of what you do today .stop it if you want to face the consequences .

i'm brain-less

Thursday, February 4, 2010 at8:28 PM

well i've think so hard of what i'm doing recently
its just so idiot until i told myself
i'm letting go of all the grudges
whatever people did to me i've letting go
let those matters rest in peace i don't give a fucking damn to it anymore
if any of the people still wants to make me burst
I'm sorry i have the power to hold my anger
trying to ruin my day carry on
& i will smile to you
wants to complain about me carry on
i know i ain't perfect neither you are perfect
if people only wants to listen to one sided story
go ahead ,because it only shows that you are also brain-less
& i will say hi we can become friend
now then i realised that how stupid am i to post those things that
only make my day worst =.=
i have the power to rule my life
you people can just kindly get lost from my sight
my life i rule it :)
don't like me get lost
i know i got a lot of things need improvement
& there are many speech that i said are rude or what
i'll improve :)